November 20th, 2008 by Co-Worker

*One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted….’Look at that dead bird!’ Someone looked up at the sky and said ‘where???’

***
While looking at a house, my brother asked the estate agent which direction
was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every
morning. She asked, ‘Does the sun rise in the north?’ When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, ‘Oh, I don’t keep up with that stuff.’ *

****
My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but ‘didn’t think she’d get sunburned because the car was moving’.*

***
I told the girl at the steakhouse register that I wanted the half kilogram sirloin. She informed me they only had an 500g sirloin. Not wanting to make a scene, I told her I would take the 500g steak instead of the half kilogram*

****
My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it’s designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped She keeps it in the boot…*

***
My friends and I were on a Lager run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount…. *

***
I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, ‘Wouldn’t the chain rip out every time she turned her head?’ I had to explain that a person’s nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned…*

***
I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. ‘Now,’ she asked me, ‘Has your plane arrived yet?’…*

***
While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. ‘Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.*

November 18th, 2008 by Co-Worker

(disclaimer, I don’t know if these are all accurate, I received this in an email

• He collects Spider-Man and Conan the Barbarian comics
• He was known as “O’Bomber” at high school for his skill at basketball
• His name means “one who is blessed” in Swahili
• His favourite meal is wife Michelle’s shrimp linguini
• He won a Grammy in 2006 for the audio version of his memoir, Dreams From My Father
• He is left-handed – the sixth post-war president to be left-handed
• He has read every Harry Potter book
• He owns a set of red boxing gloves autographed by Muhammad Ali
• He worked in a Baskin-Robbins ice cream shop as a teenager and now can’t stand ice cream
• His favourite snacks are chocolate-peanut protein bars
• He ate dog meat, snake meat, and roasted grasshopper while living in Indonesia
• He can speak Spanish
• While on the campaign trail he refused to watch CNN and had sports channels on instead
• His favourite drink is black forest berry iced tea
• He promised Michelle he would quit smoking before running for president – he didn’t
• He kept a pet ape called Tata while in Indonesia
• He can bench press an impressive 200lbs
• He was known as Barry until university when he asked to be addressed by his full name
• His favourite book is Moby-Dick by Herman Melville
• He visited Wokingham, Berks, in 1996 for the stag party of his half-sister’s fiancé, but left when a stripper arrived
• His desk in his Senate office once belonged to Robert Kennedy
• He and Michelle made $4.2 million (£2.7 million) last year, with much coming from sales of his books
• His favourite films are Casablanca and One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
• He carries a tiny Madonna and child statue and a bracelet belonging to a soldier in Iraq for good luck
• He applied to appear in a black pin-up calendar while at Harvard but was rejected by the all-female committee.
• His favourite music includes Miles Davis, Bob Dylan, Bach and The Fugees
• He took Michelle to see the Spike Lee film Do The Right Thing on their first date
• He enjoys playing Scrabble and poker
• He doesn’t drink coffee and rarely drinks alcohol
• He would have liked to have been an architect if he were not a politician
• As a teenager he took drugs including marijuana and cocaine
• His daughters’ ambitions are to go to Yale before becoming an actress (Malia, 10) and to sing and dance (Sasha, 7)
• He hates the youth trend for trousers which sag beneath the backside
• He repaid his student loan only four years ago after signing his book deal
• His house in Chicago has four fire places
• Daughter Malia’s godmother is Jesse Jackson’s daughter Santita
• He says his worst habit is constantly checking his BlackBerry
• He uses an Apple Mac laptop
• He drives a Ford Escape Hybrid, having ditched his gas-guzzling Chrysler 300
• He wears $1,500 (£952) Hart Schaffner Marx suits
• He owns four identical pairs of black size 11 shoes
• He has his hair cut once a week by his Chicago barber, Zariff, who charges $21 (£13)
• His favourite fictional television programmes are Mash and The Wire
• He was given the code name “Renegade” by his Secret Service handlers
• He was nicknamed “Bar” by his late grandmother
• He plans to install a basketball court in the White House grounds
• His favourite artist is Pablo Picasso
• His speciality as a cook is chilli
• He has said many of his friends in Indonesia were “street urchins”
• He keeps on his desk a carving of a wooden hand holding an egg, a Kenyan symbol of the fragility of life
• His late father was a senior economist for the Kenyan government

November 18th, 2008 by Co-Worker

Twilight

Reviewed by Owen Gleiberman | B (read more)

Bolt

Reviewed by Lisa Schwarzbaum | A- (read more)

Quantum of Solace

Reviewed by Lisa Schwarzbaum | B- (read more)

Slumdog Millionaire

Reviewed by Owen Gleiberman | B (read more)

Special

Reviewed by Adam Markovitz | C+ (read more)

The Betrayal

Reviewed by Owen Gleiberman | B- (read more)

The Guitar

Reviewed by Owen Gleiberman | C+ (read more)

We Are Wizards

Reviewed by Lisa Schwarzbaum | B+ (read more)

Lake City

Reviewed by Lisa Schwarzbaum | C- (read more)

A Christmas Tale

Reviewed by Lisa Schwarzbaum | A (read more)

November 7th, 2008 by Co-Worker

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November 7th, 2008 by Co-Worker

The new James Bond film Quantum of Solace, which opens in the US on November 14 and Australia on November 19, is already breaking international records.

Daniel Craig’s second tour of James Bond duty made an estimated $US38.6 million ($A56.45 million) overseas in the weekend ending November 3, despite playing in only three markets.

According to media reports, Quantum of Solace made a whopping $US25.3 million ($A37.0 million) in the United Kingdom, easily breaking the three-day premiere record held by Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.

In France, Quantum of Solace added another $US10.6 million ($A15.5 million) and in Sweden, the film’s $US2.7 million ($A3.95 million) take was the fourth biggest launch ever.

AAP

November 7th, 2008 by Co-Worker

 

Prolific novelist and “ER” creator Michael Crichton has passed away. He was 66.

Perhaps best known for being the author of Jurassic Park and its sequel The Lost World, which were turned into a hugely successful movie franchise, his numerous books have sold over 150 million copies worldwide.

In what his family calls an unexpected death, it was revealed that he was waging a private battle against cancer.

“While the world knew him as a great storyteller that challenged our preconceived notions about the world around us — and entertained us all while doing so — his wife Sherri, daughter Taylor, family and friends knew Michael Crichton as a devoted husband, loving father and generous friend who inspired each of us to strive to see the wonders of our world through new eyes,” his family tells ET. “He did this with a wry sense of humor that those who were privileged to know him personally will never forget.”

More Here

November 5th, 2008 by Co-Worker

November 5th, 2008 by Co-Worker

November 4th, 2008 by Co-Worker

Certainly not what he would have wanted so close to the elections.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/11/03/obama.grandma/

Sen. Barack Obama’s grandmother, Madelyn Dunham, has died following a bout with cancer, Obama and his sister, Maya Soetoro-Ng, said Monday.

She was 86.

At a rally in Charlotte, North Carolina, Monday night, the Illinois senator said “she has gone home and she died peacefully in her sleep with my sister at her side.”

“I’m not going to talk about it long because it’s hard to talk about,” he added.

Obama remembered her as “one of those quiet heroes we have across America, who aren’t famous … but each and every day they work hard. They look after their families. They look after their children and their grandchildren.”

In a statement released Monday afternoon, Obama and his sister said that Dunham was “the cornerstone of our family, and a woman of extraordinary accomplishment, strength, and humility.”

November 1st, 2008 by Co-Worker

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